Christmas morning at Our House:)

Seth's Christmas, a bike and helmet and gloves and riding glasses:



Tori's Christmas, an ipod nano and itunes card:



Ryan's Christmas, a PSP:



Daniel's Christmas, a PSP:




Lita? lol! My Lita's Christmas gift was hunting clothes:



Isabella's Christmas? Music Music...an ipod and itunes card:



Michael's Gift? An ipod (the old kind that Santa nearly never found!!) and a itunes card:



Tasha's gift was a personal DVD player and case and three movies:)



Samuel's Christmas, a bike, helmet and air pump:



Rosie's Christmas, a camera and camera case:




Mercedez Christmas was a speaker for her ipod and an itunes card:



Carlton's Christmas, underarmour hoodie, long sleeve shirt and short sleeved shirt:




John's Christmas? Kinect!




Jacob's Christmas? A new phone....



Doug's gift? IPad asseccories:




Joseph's gift? Underarmour hoodie, short sleeve shirt and long sleeve shirt:



Sarah's gift, a nook and cover:



Paden's gift? Running shoes:




Stuart's gift? A guitar...but I don't have pictures yet!
Caleb's gift? HP7 audio, thermal undies and phone card...and goodies stuff
Chelsea and Bo? Gift cards for each a rocking chair for thier porch:)

Love from Afghanistan

Caleb knows his momma loves pictures (well, second to my people). This morning he sent me this picture of his face, which I miss very much! He also sent me me 5 songs clips:) PFC Smotherman and PFC Moody...what a funny pair. I love that they did an intro before the songs. If I could figure out how to get them here I would...but my technology is limited. I will have to find help. A shame my computer guru Caleb is far far away!!

Merry Christmas Caleb!!

Me and my Tori:)

Tori and I both sporting our new haircuts. Picture taken by Seth, who proclaimed it a perfect shot. lol:)

I had two sweet friends, Andrea and Leigh Ann, who gave me cut and color for the entire year of 2009!! HUGE BIG DEAL!! I enjoyed my last cut and color today:) Thank you for helping me be a brunette:) Love you both!!!

Christmas will come a day early at the Smotherman house. In the morning we will wake and have our family tome together. After lunch we have Sam's intensive yada yada yada guy coming for yet another visit. After that we hope to pack up the trailer and be ready to head out early Christmas morning. Visions of family all in my head....I am so ready for Christmas:)

Today I have talked to my two sons whom I will not see the Christmas. I talked this morning for 34 minutes to Caleb. I try to be very positive for Caleb, but frankly, being away from home at Christmas, being in Afghanistan is just yucky. No nice way to say it. I miss Caleb. We all miss Caleb. We have 3 months (almost to the day) until he his on his way back to Germany and then...BIG leave home. So, suffice to say, part of my Christmas will be arriving late:)

I also talked to Zack. I cried. I can change nothing. I love the guy. He loves Scott and I. Wish wishing really worked. Wish I could wish away the troubles of this life. Sadly, it just doesn't work that way. Life can be so hard and while we treasure family so much at this time of the year? Family is equally loved, cherished and enjoyed on EVERY day of the year. I will always love Zack even though he is not here.

Merry Christmas to all:) Hope you and yours enjoy the blessing God has given you!!!

Fishing with Ms Gail

Today Ms Gail came and picked up some on my guys to go fishing. Fish were biting and the water was calling:) Ryan, Seth and Michael all went and had an great time!!! Seth caught 3, Ryan and Michael each 6 and Ms Gail a bunch too. I am so thankful for good friends, Gail is among those good friends:)

Joseph's DAY:)

It finally came, it finally arrived....Joseph's DAY! It was no surprise to anyone what the "cup" was:)

While I'm venting....

:)

While I'm venting, since my children do indeed read my blog, I need to go ahead and clarify a few things. I have always been clear, in my mind. I have always been open to discussion, again in my mind. But, after a conversation with a hot (and I do not mean good looking) child last night, I feel I need to put this in writing....

In life there are rules...things we MUST follow. Sometimes they may seem...lol...sometimes the ARE orders. Such as:

•DO NOT ENTER
•DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS
•DO NOT OPEN
•DO NOT CALL
•DO NOT REMOVE
•DO NOT ENTER
•DO NOT TURN
•DO NOT PASS
•DON'T DRINK WATER
•DO NOT CROSS
•DO NOT RESUSCITATE

Those are not open for your consideration...You simply DO NOT!

There are suggestions in this life:
•PLEASE DO NOT LITTER
•PLEASE DON'T SMOKE
•PLEASE WHISPER
•PLEASE DON'T PICK THE FLOWERS
•PLEASE TURN OFF CELL PHONES
•PLEASE DON'T TOUCH
•PLEASE DON'T FEED THE SQUIRRELS
•PLEASE NO EATING
•PLEASE DO NOT DISTURB
•PLEASE DO NOT WALK ON GRASS
•PLEASE DON'T HONK
•PLEASE DO NOT OPEN
•PLEASE DON'T COPY
•PLEASE DO NOT CALL
•PLEASE DO NOT CROSS LINE
•PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE
•PLEASE REMOVE SHOES

Those are nicely worded rules. Meaning you can break them but count on consequences. Copy from a book and fail a class due to plagiarism. Touch an alligator and perhaps loose your hand (or your wallet when you finish paying the fine). I think you should get these...nicely worded rules.

Then there are LIFE rules, the rules that make or break your existence. You can live peaceably in this world if you follow these rules. These rules apply to EVERYONE...no exceptions!


•PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL OF OTHERS BELIEFS
•PLEASE BE EDUCATED
•PLEASE BE HONEST
•PLEASE BE HELPFUL
•PLEASE BE SINCERE
•PLEASE BE COURTEOUS
•PLEASE BE GRATEFUL

I think our Lord even used these rules in his book...perhaps you remember?

You, me, everyone need to seriously come to grips with the fact that there are rules in this life. They will not be going anywhere and I imagine in your lifetime the "List" will only get longer, not shorter.

As a parent I can assure you I know more about safety than you do. I know more about what's serious than you do. When I say "Don't touch that outlet!" it's because I know that to avoid electrical shock you need to stay away from outlets. If I have a fire in the kitchen and tell you not to put water on it. I mean what I say and expect you to obey immediately. I do not have time to tell you that "Never put water on a cooking fire -- it could make the fire bigger." is a rule most adults know. I am likely to be looking for Jacob with his fire extinguishers (lol...memories Jake!) or I will be attempting to put it out and if that fails call 911...it is NOT the time to argue with me or fail to listen. I do not always have the time or even feel the need to explain the "why" to you. Although if you ask me respectfully at an appropriate time? Like after the fire is taken care of and out? I am happy to.

Rules parents have for their children almost always revolve around SAFETY. As you grow older I am not so concerned about electrical outlets or the same things I worried about when you were a young child. Today the things I worry about are just as "unknown" or "unthought of" to you as the outlet was to you when you were a toddler. I am not really willing to allow you to cause harm to yourself to figure it out on your own. This is why we have rules.

The failure to follow those rules? Well, they will be hard, tough, yucky and not at all pleasant....why? So the next time you THINK about respecting the rules of your parents.

Any rules you truly do not understand? I am more than willing to talk about...but you need to understand that in the end? MY rules are the rules that you will follow. When you are an adult? Then you are happy to do as you please.

How far back is ....

I wonder exactly how far back something has to have occurred to actually be considered "in the past"?

Yesterday we sat (Scott and Sam and I) with the Intensive yada yada yada therapist and as an example to independent behavior I talked about a situation that happened about 15 minutes before the therapist arrived. I asked if I should have intervened (I was 4 feet away and watching as I wrapped gifts)? I did not intervene and instead ending up watching Sam make several mistakes, disrespecting anothers personal space....which really "looked" like him hitting the couch with a paint stick above her head....her asking him to stop....him not stopping....her asking again...him walking around to stand over her (bullying big time!)....then he dropped/threw/ tossed the stick or in his words "let it slip" from his hand to the couch (right beside sister!)....at the "slipping" point I intervened.

I truly believe children have to be given opportunity to succeed independently in to be and understand what success is....but with Sam, the urge to just take the paint stick away and give him a consequence for picking it up(which is not allowed either) is awfully great. Every single conversation with Sam seems to begin and end with "why can't you trust me?? ...why can't you give me another chance??" When I am a few feet away and I do not see imminent danger I am willing to see how he does. I am usually disappointed. Sam is falling apart pretty quickly. Scott and I talked about it last night. He refuses to be respectful in church because "I forgot all that stuff" ....meaning its okay to write on yourself, giggle, talk out loud, be disruptive to others worship, not listen to mom and dad and plain old be disrespectful to God...not to mention Scott spoke last night and he could have perhaps just listened to Dad's five minute talk (except he "don't remember that stuff"). He is oppositional (no surprise) and he is loosing his ability to Honeymoon. Again, no surprise just sad and bad.

But, I lost my way, the question was how far back is the past? As we sat talking Sam(refusing to make eye contact and mumbling) did not want to talk about the paint stick incident...why? "That was in the past and I don't want to talk about things in the past!" I seem to think of the past AFTER the situation is defused and we have time to talk about it. The past comes AFTER the dealing with.

Needless to say, the day to day is plain old hard for everyone (but especially Sam).

No days gift opening today......

Today would be Stuarts day to open.....but....Stuart is in Missouri at his girl friend Hannah house. He was due home today, but is apparently having soooooo much fun he is extending his trip until Friday. So...no days opening today.

Another driver....almost.

Today Carlton went to test for his permit....and passed!! He is really happy..lol:) Of course! Now for the practicing part:)

Sweet People

Today a lady called and said she had a delivery from my son Caleb. Sarah answered the phone and in a few minutes a sweet lady from an area church was in my driveway. Their class bought a gift for area soldiers children and in my case, the soldier's mom:) I was so very touched (could cry if I think about it too much). They bought me a beautiful necklace...the one above. There are some people who truly think of meaningful ways to make a difference. I love that! I also had two very dear friends give big gifts today...I am always so humbled by the sweet spirits of those I love!

There are no words that fully say what I want to say....except for the ones that have been around for thousands of years...THANK YOU!! I sincerely hope that I can be as gracious and loving and giving!!!

Love this!!

I love this song. I like this video with it better than any I have seen.

Grandmother's Chex mix

Grandmother's Chex Mix is almost akin to GOLD around our house:) Chelsea made lots for everyone at the beach and after sampling her "gold" I decided we could enjoy a little of that too. This morning I have it in the oven and in a while we can feast:)

Seth helped me this morning, love having helpers in the kitchen!

Chex Mix:
1 box of Cheerios
1 box of Rice Chex
1 box of Corn Chex
1 bag of pretzel sticks
a pound of pecans (or mixed nuts), we add a pound of cashews too
6 sticks of butter
1T salt
1T garlic powder
1/4 c Worchershire

Melt butter and last 3 ingredients and poor over cereal and pretzels (we do snap all the sticks in half....thank you Sethie!)

Bake on 250* for one hour, stirring every 15 minutes

Cool and enjoy!!

PS...this does make a bunch...Seth is snapping the pretzels in half the recipe...be prepared:) AND you can make this recipe with no nuts...I do one recipe no nuts for Stuart and Scott....it is still wonderful:)

Fish Tales

Daniel and Ryan stayed with our friend Ms Gail while we did out running trip to Atlanta. Daniel brought this beauty home with him today! No fish tales!! We have pictures:)

Sam....

I have not posted much about Sam being home. For lots of reasons (most I cannot explain).

I do find at times I am pretty sure that nothing has changed. I am also pretty sure that nothing "can" change. Sad, very sad. Yet, while sadness it huge, it is still hard hard hard to deal with the day in day out.

These things I know:

1) Sam refuses to be honest about his feelings and behaviors. Everything is "I used to be that way, it's not a problem now." He so much wants to be home that he will not talk about his feeling with us or the therapist who is in the house 3or4 hours a week.

2) Sam is frustrated (in spite of denials) that he does not have the same freedoms as others. There are safe guards in place that MUST be there....he does not like them. 'Nuff said.

3)Line of sight? A HUGE order and not very realistic (I have to go to the potty sometime).

4)Appeals are still in play....we are still waiting. We have enrolled him in school, which would begin in Jan, but hope that the appeals are resolved by then.

5)There are so many "between the lines" that could be spoken, but not enough time to even begin.

I have had several ask....just updating....kinda.