a call from far away...

Sunday morning I was standing in the laundry room helping my girls and boys dress from church when my cell phone rang. Usually it's just a big kid from the other end of the house calling but this time it was a crazy looking number (which always means one thing)....CALEB! I answered quickly and was just humbled to hear his voice. Tears came to my eyes and laughter to my heart. He quickly said it cost a lot of money to call and he didn't have much on him, and there wasn't a bank close by (silly guy!). I listened for a little less than 2 minutes. I was able to say all my "words" which are surprisingly (or not) revived every single time we talk or write.

I would like to say that I am the "bomb-diggetty" of strength, that I have faith like no other....that part might be true...but my faith is based on the understanding that Gods will and mine might not meet, my abiding with this world is sometimes tested. I want him home safely, home to Savannah Tennessee (and then to a life he chooses where-ever). I have to keep in mind as I pray ....That Caleb IS where he choose. He, the goofy guy, knew this would be part of the mission he began. He will see things, touch people, be the incredible young man I know he is to so many. God definitely has plans for Caleb, and they are already in place, already moving.

But as a mom? I am proud, I am joyful, I am thankful, I am grateful, I am in love with my son Caleb. And I don't think it is too much to add to that respectful line that I, his mother, misses him for all the previously stated reasons:)

Every family has one...

Every family has one...or in my case a couple....mouthers. The kids that can't hush, don't know when enough is enough, and in turn usually are not even well informed...just mouthy! Sarah took the picture above and laughed saying, "I took this for when you need a picture of Ryan to blog about." Ryan is such a child. I did laugh at Paden ...this is what most reasonable adults look like when dealing with the absurd!

I started to save the picture...but knew I would just loose it:) With every event, every ball game there is this. It is part of life, part of sports. Perhaps not my favorite part, but always a wonderful example...usually of how NOT to be! Everyone sees the behavior except the mouthy. I hope, in time, with a lot of perspective Ryan learns to be reasonable.

That said, I am not terribly sure I want him to loose all of it. It is that spirit, that fire that can do great things in life! Great things for the Lord, if properly directed. These kids, these mouthy hardheaded kids, they make me scream and they make me laugh, but most of all they keep me on my toes:)

Team Sarah vs Team Paden

Weekends around our house are always fun and pretty busy. The busy being the people more so than activities. We are really lucky that ballgames are only of the weekdays. It allows us a break.

Sarah and Paden were here to play....They picked teams and played a very long time in the backyard! Long enough I got sunburned just watching:) It sure was fun!


Sarah had her perhaps first ever baseball injury. While pitching to Lita (it would be Lita!)....Lita hit an incredibly hard line drive into Sarah's stomach. Sarah yelled before the ball ever hit her and her reflexes just didn't get her glove up in time....so Sarah has a baseball tattoo on her belly. After watching a few minutes Paden had to ask "Are you laughing or crying?". I think the answer might have been both!

My kids run hard....

play rough.....

and enjoy themselves....

Of all the things I love about having a big family, these games, this kind of fun is among my favorite things!! I love my kiddos and I love backyard ball:)

Heartbreaking

I have watched video and read articles regarding the woman from Tennessee who put her grandson on a plane back to Russia. I say grandson because by all legal intents and purposes that is exactly what he is. The whole story makes me sad. Sad for all involved. I would be the very last person to persecute the family of this boy. I too have had sons who drug me to the edge of sanity. I have. I have been lucky, well not lucky, I(Scott and I) have WORKED very hard to find services for my tough guys. Did I know we would have obstacles? Yes. Did I have any idea how serious? Of course not! Who does?

One of our hard truths in our family is the saying: This is your home. We are your family. At such a time your issues become bigger than we can deal with? We will seek help. We will seek those who can help you, but we will still be mom and dad. This will always be your home (even if the choices take them away, I want to opportunity to come home to be there ...).

In the case of the story we read about? Lack of help. A family bit off a huge bite. They stuck their head and hearts out in hopes of perfection(My opinion). Whether their expectation were realistic or not, I do know that there are very few places to turn to when you have children who are having emotional issues. We are blessed only because my children are adopted (well, my tough guys) from foster care and they quality for TN Care based on that...the family in the news? No such luck. No resources fueled their desperation. I am so sad for them.

I have people ask me all the time if I can get help "because they are adopted". lol. NO! It just doesn't work that way. Much like a marriage, except the binds are even more bound(ending such a union between you and your children end in serious charges!!). Marriage can be dissolved when people "get tired" or find that the "for better or worst" was worst than they planned on! NOT the same with children. For better or worst means just that! This story is about adoption, yet there are parents who give birth to their children and likely have great empathy as well for the lack of mental health and the accessibility of treatment.

I am sorry for the boy as well. He too had expectations. The issues of an institutionalized child (and at age 5 or 6 they are significant) is not something to take lightly! If the parents were ill equipped? I am sorry for him. It takes time, literally years, to "find" a place in this world.

Our children (and adoption has nothing to do with it!!)....Our children, our children who grow up in loving homes, who know and understand the love of parents, who see the way a family works, who love without pain....Our children are blessed. We are blessed. Trust, Faith, Understanding, Hope and Love are just words until they are shown. Unconditional love can be hard...but it is absolutely necessary to be the people God intends us to be...to be the parents we are meant to be.

For dreams lost, for those innocents hurt, for the who are impacted by this situation...it is heartbreaking and I am so sorry!

I can't help but KNOW that God totally understands the hearts of all involved. God understands the sadness, the losses, the hardship of raising tough kids! It would be nice to think that pointing fingers would be replaced by adoption support reform. Not words, very real actions that are backed with very real resources. A very nice thought.

Makin Music 2010!

My guys, Stuart and Doug, were both in Makin Music this year. Both supporting Xi Chi Delta:) The clubs did such a great job this year (all of them) and it was super fun to watch! We did not take everyone this year, instead I took Mercedez and we went with Chelsea and Bo group. We met Sarah, Paden and Sandy for dinner at the Mexican restaurant and it was so fun to be able to sit and quietly enjoy a meal with some of my favorite people!! It was also wonderful night and I so enjoyed having Mercedez along with us. Mercedez is growing up. She behaves well and appropriately, making her a super fun buddy to have along!

Our family of Makin Music'ers. Chelsea and Bo....along with Bo's sweet cousin Alison, Doug and Stuart and sister Mercedez!

Chelsea and Bo with their youth group (and Mercedez sliding it too!).


Stuart and Doug as gargoyles:) They look so very nice:) lol!


PTC group ready to leave today:(


My Tori on the PTC bus...I am thankful she told us she could climb up and hide in the bus...it would not have been very funny if she had really stowed away! Now everyone knows to look well before they leave:)


Sad and happy. I am very sad to see Bo and Chelsea leave...but so very happy to know they are happy and living a wonderful life in Georgia:)

Tasha:)

This week has been busy. Yesterday Chelsea and Bo arrived with 4 of thier youth group kids. We will be going to Makin Music tonight. It was really nice to have them here. Sarah and Paden joined us as we all went to Tasha's ballgame. All does not include Tori, who had practice and Michael/Ryan/Daniel who had a scrimmage. Chelsea and Bo are coming back in May to watch the others play so last night was the night to see Tasha:) She did great, her team did great and they won. Tasha is one of my wonderfully hardheaded kids whose hardheadedness was tested (she was hit in the head with a softball last night). SHe played the whole game with her eye brow three times the size it should have been...although this morning it had dropped low and her eye was nearly closed due to swelling (but the positive side it that it has yet to change colors!). We all come in and ate dinner much later than usual (thankfully my ham did not die in the oven and was just right perfect). It was a great evening:) I love having my kids home!

WOW

I can only WOW the placement we found (well, Scott found) for Sam. Nestled in the mountains on the Tennessee river it is a serious "back to nature" treatment facility. Specifically targeting adolescents who have not been successful in traditional treatment this program is incredible. We actually left hopeful. In the past, truly, we have left centers feeling that they are the equivalent to a babysitter. Success has not been in Sam past with treatment. This place was ...well...it was WOW. Now, we just need insurance to kick in and Sam's is on his way! The 15 hour round trip was well worth it!