A smiling face:)

I sure love my daily messages with Caleb. I am ever ever grateful that my neat son takes time to chat with his momma! Today he sent me some pictures:) He's pretty wonderful like that! He is all the way in Afghanistan but every morning(nearly) I wake to a message "Good morning Momma". I am so very thankful for the life of this son.

I am truly blessed with great kids. I am. I sometimes in the midst of yapping I have to stop and acknowledge that. They are kids. My grown kids? Goodness I love those who have grown up to be the lovely Christians!

In my bountiful way, I find that I most of my life is someone else's "squared". I find the joy, sorrow, giggle, fussing, excitement and frustration is decidedly more than the average family. I smiled as I had to cut up all the old medical cards. Do you know how long that took?

I think it took a lot longer than a family with just a couple cards:)

Glad we have those new cards! Sarah has had the flu this week. SO YUCKY. The only child in our family to NOT have her flu shot....perhaps a lesson learned? I am just praying her strand is the same strand the rest of received in our shots! In spite of her sickness, it has been nice to see her face (in between long naps) during the day:)

Sam's headed to School

Sam has been my daytime side-kick and Scott's evening side-kick for a month now. We have been in appeals upon appeals for intervention. Those are all still "open appeals", yet the time has come to stop waiting on intervetnion. I would like to think that once I stop expecting it to happen...it will! But, pessimism is prevailing and hope for that help is dwindling. The time has come to switch directions. We actually are required by law to educate Sam. It's a right he has. I am not going to try to teach Sam at home, I cannot. One, I am not qualified to teach him given his limitations. Two, I (and likely Sam) seriously need a break. Sam is finished with his "honeymoon" phase and seriously moving toward anger at his limitations.

Sadly, Scott and I have spent MONTHS trying to advocate for the APPROPRIATE place for Sam. I feel guilt at placing him in school. I do. No doubt. Why? Because it is not the right place for Sam and he will literally fall apart. If he proves me wrong? I will be overjoyed. But I don't see that happening. Scott and I realize just by being home and certainly by entering school(even in the environment we have prepared for...)....we are setting him up for failure because he is NOT capable of thriving or even maintaining in either place.

That said, this week we had a meeting at school to go over his IEP (eligibly and course study). So..... it begins. I cannot express the prayers that have led us here or the prayers that will continue.

A prayer for my children....

Talking to another mother, who has two grown and married children, we were discussing our prayers for our children and their spouses. I know most people pray for their children from the time they are young, praying for the person they will someday marry. I have. I certainly have a perfect "score" on that prayer life. Chelsea is married to a wonderful man, a Christian (and I do not use that word lightly!!).

Bo has parents who have embraced Chelsea, who love Chelsea. They call her their own and I love that!! Why? Because SHE IS!

My wise friend made the comment that in our prayer life we should pray for our children to marry individuals who come from families that blend. A funny saying to me, but I immediately understood.

The family my child marries into becomes MY family and vice versa. We SHARE our children and the lives they will lead. It is as God intended. No man is a mountain and families are not meant to be "ONLY US" kind of people, they are intended to be the hands of God. God is open and loving. God cares for our every need, He desires a close relationship with us....because He LOVES us. That is the family I am now praying for when I bring my children to God in prayer. When I pray for the spouses they will have, I will include the families too.

In the past I have not placed enough importance on those families. I hear people say, "You don't marry the family". Maybe that's true, but you sure have to live with them! Even if it's from afar.

I want my children to have the family, extended family, that I have had....peace, joy and love accompanying the "in-laws". I don't often call Scott's parents in-laws. Something about that just sounds wrong. They are Scott's parents who opened their home to me so very long ago. They are a blending family. They have added to their family time and time again and they are accepting and loving....it really is a God thing!

So, my prayer for my children? They find spouses who are Christians (in the truest sense) and that the families those individuals come from? That they are as God, open to blending their family. I know this is a BIG issue, but in truth I hope all my children understand....even now....that who they marry IS one of the most important decisions they will make in this lifetime. They need to not ever take it lightly and they always need to look at the WHOLE picture! I so greatly desire them to be nurtured by families that love them too:)

I think I can safely say that Scott and I have blended time and time again. My children are all capable to of it...but it is not an attribute all people have. I am so prayerful that our family continues to grow, living together and loving together.

7 years.....

Seven years seems like such a short period of time, and so often it is. But in our parenting of these three guys? Seven years have gone from these faces:



To these faces:



Today I spent the day (or part of it) with these three guys. Carlton had to be back in Millington, Sam was with me because he is not yet in school and Zack we did not get to see during Christmas. So Carlton, Sam and I went and picked up Zack for a few hours.

I so badly wish these guys had strong bonds. I truly believe that relationships, family, can help you weather any storm. But for these guys? Family IS the storm.

Scott talked some the other night about parenting to each child's "bend". All of our children are different. All unique and seriously individual in their personalities, it is as God intended. But for these three the "bend" is so opposite. They do not share common beliefs or idealism's. As I sat today with them I was so sad FOR them. They do not realize the losses, but I do. I cannot tell you how competitive these guys are! Way beyond average. So much so that during our wait for our meal today they each had three refills. Why all three? Why all three refills? Not one of them wanted the other to have more. Some serious competition but telling of the depth of that seed.

Carlton does not like the boys. He is much like Hitler having to lunch with two Jews. He has always felt superior. No empathy or concern for either brother.

Sam acts like he is Cinderella and the others are the Step Sisters who receive so much more than he. Jealous to the end (unlike sweet Cinderella).

Zack? He just thinks they're all the Three Amigos! He never sees the bad (sounds nice until you have to deal with him on tough issues...he sees not wrong in doing what feels good!). He thinks they are the best of friends and treats them thus...which fuels the other two. It is a viscous cycle.

I told Scott I am not sure when I will ever have them all together again. It's days like today I wish for miracles...for Divine intervention...for the impossible. I wish to turn back time and see these boys have a chance at life! But, it is what it is...and sadly the "is" just isn't good enough.

Bloggers mind..

I have way to many "blogs" rolling around in my mind right now. TOO many things have happened. I feel like Doug, pictured above with his pile of snowballs. I too have been storing up and all my snowballs (my thoughts) are melting as I wait to share them.

In stead of spending the next 10 blogs yapping I will blog once with some limited thoughts:)

Our minister talked today about treasuring the gift INSIDE the wrapping. He talked about the outside wrapping and presentation of a gift being so very beautiful, so pleasing....yet the REAL gift is what's inside. I love that thought. I am "friends" on facebook with several of my children's friends. I have watched the gifts given and it is really concerning to me. In this day and age I have to wonder, "Do our gifts enhance the beauty within our children or do they simply make the package look better?" That's a discussion I would like to have with like minded people. I would like to know, truly, how to change the perception of gift-giving. I say that knowing that my children did not all receive "inside enhancing" gifts... A serious thought for me too!

I spent a long time talking to Caleb today. He had a horrible day. It began horribly and ended with some sweet blessings. It made me think of this quote I read:

"When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn."
by: unknown

True, right? There are times in life that we are faced with incredible odds, with incredible mountains, and in the midst of those moments? We need to always hold on, always keep faith.

I know Caleb gets tired of war. I do not think he is any different from any other soldier. I love IKE and loved seeing this quote....

"I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its stupidity."
General Eisenhower

Caleb is not alone, no soldier is alone. They are surrounded by men who are fighting a brutal stupid war....all for US!

My Resolution this year is encompassed into on word "STRENGTHEN"...strengthen my faith, my study, my relationships, my friendships, my children,my health, and my prayer life (and with that my prayers for my son and ALL those who are so far away from home!)....to see a new and greater strength in all I do!!

Another yappy thought is attitude. Gosh, I have a bunch of kids who need serious adjustments!! The number one attitude adjustment has to be the attitude of gratitude. We are living in a world that is seemingly out of control with false senses of entitlement! Our children, live in a world that falsely tells them they are due things. DUE? That word in my generation applied to bad behaviors, as in, "They're gonna get what they're due!" That "due" that kids want, feel owed? Serious thinking errors!! The word this generation needs to have stamped on their hearts? EARN!! We get what we earn. That is positive thinking. Again, I would like a long class on this too:)

I could go on and on, but as I look up Sam is coming across the yard with a baseball bat. This might be a good time for me to stop and get back to the real world!

Happy New Year Friends and Family. May 2011 bring you strength:)

Loving family!

Our week at Gulf Shores was, as always, incredible! We began our trip to the beach via the North Pole....um...I really mean North Alabama! That's Scott in front of me in the van pulling the trailer. We left home to NO snow but traveled through a Winter Wonderland on the way!! Started the day with snow and ended it with sand...very nice!

This was my home away from home. I shared this house with all my girls and Bo:)

Scott had the next house with boys and my 4 big boys had a cabin.

This was the view from my porch every evening....



These snapshots are some of my favorites....it's hard to blog 300 pictures:) I guess I can use them the in the next few months.... SO many of these have storied behind them, so many I wish I were actually listening to (as it looks like there was some real fun going on!). I must say they are not my "best" pictures....just my favorites!


























I so very much love this tradition. I love having a quiet time out with those I miss seeing through the year! I love that my children hold this tradition in their hearts and priorities too. I am ever so thankful for Scott's parents and the gift of time and family they have been giving to us all these years!!!



This is our whole extended family who vacationed with us, minus some very much loved family who could not be with us!

One more thing......

A quick addendum to my Christmas blog......

My oldest son, more known as my traveling son, Stuart arrived late Christmas and we enjoyed watching him open his presents.

Stuart's Day of Christmas:




His Christmas gift:




LOVE hearing him play!!