You don't care about me!

You don't care about me are about the silliest words a child could speak to a loving parent. I know there are parents who don't care.... Bunches and bunches of them! But, if your parent is actually talking to you? They care.

I have one daughter who is currently on a mountain of disrespect. I doubt she stays there too long because she is quickly running out of supplies. She battled, truly battled to maintain her position and now the stress of her situation is rising.

In some ways her behavior is my "fault" and I will assume full responsibility. She is 14 and I believe capable of making decisions (many) on her own, certainly she is choosing her words and actions. I enable my children to choose. I like them to choose....

Scott and I were asked "How do you help your children achieve their potential?". Scott smiled, "By letting them choose what they want in life." He's very smart like that. I know every single mother knows her children strengths and with that can envision careers and lives built around those strengths. But, some of our children will actually choose roads that are challenging and not at all MY choice. It's kinda the whole point of choosing:)

I do not have angelic brainwashed kids (although that does sound pretty sweet). I have average run of the mill God given children who have the world at their feet and really great running shoes:)

To our children's utter dissatisfaction there is actually road mom and dad expect you to stick to. You have a "way", granted sometimes a private road but paved or unpaved, stick to the road. Did you know this little statistics?

According to the Federal Highway Administration 2008 statistics, there are 2,734,102 miles of paved public roads in the United Sates, with an additional 1,324,245 miles of unpaved public roads. This information can be found in Table HM-12 of "Highway Statistics 2008."

To me that says, there are a whole lot (lol..slight understatement) of acceptable places you can go if you stay on the road. My mother in law always says, "Keeping it in the middle of the road." That's where my kids need to be. It can be a road to basketball, soccer, music, photography...the roads are endless but the rules are not. Rules of the Highway are pretty simple, much like the rules of our home. Respect self and others, be on time, follow the rules, tell the truth and take ownership for your own actions.

Trail blazing is for those who have accomplished all the driving tests...once my children are grown I actually encourage trail blazing...it's how they become independent, yet I would never do that if they had not spent years practicing the rules.

The trail up my dear daughter mountain in not an official road. It is way off the approved road and with that unbeaten path come a whole host of consequences. I do think that consequences with become so tough to bare that she will re-evaluate her position. I expect a change...a change only she can make. Choices are wonderful and they are also truly damning. A single choice can alter your entire future. Scott and I had many many a talk with our boys as they grew into manhood about choices. The same is true of each individual. God gave my children a mother and father who work very very hard to keep those choices on the wonderful side. Why? Because contrary to any words spoken in anger....we do care, very much!