<shew>

I am not even sure how to begin talking about my trio of toughies. Which is why I always say toughies...it's tough!

Yesterday Scott and I sat through two meetings, one with Zack and one with Carlton. We talked to Sam on the way home, and later to his worker who was in route to a mental hospital with Sam who was simply out of control.

To back up...Zack is moving to a level 3 group home. He had a visit this past weekend and did well, liked it a lot. We are thankful he does like it, it isn't a necessity, but it sure does make the transition much easier. He threw up on big red flag for Scott and I but we let it slide, so much has to happen before home is ever an option.

We sat with Carlton, who is in an exceptional program, and his staff. The bottom line? Carlton is about Carlton, unrealistic expectations and unfounded belief of entitlement. We helped with that, I believe. He will be coming home for Spring Break in a couple of weeks, time will tell.

And Sam. I received a letter from his worker stating that Sam might "need more structure" than they can provide. Sadly, the story of Sam's life. It included the "you might start thinking about other options". I want to just cry, "What options!?". There are no long term (because Sam's issues are not going anywhere) options. They do not exist to our knowledge. Long lines of short term hospitalizations are not really what we are hoping for. Sad Sad Sad! Perhaps most frustrating is that Sam is in control of himself, he is not without understanding. We have found an incredibly wonderful placement for Sam and he has chosen to trash it.

I know God had a hand in these guys becoming ours. I know we have been able to influence them, yet keeping these guys safe, alive and from impending jail is a hard thing!! One of the hardest things in my life. I looked at my calender for the next month, for March, currently scheduled without any more appointments (which appear to be looming) I will be on the road around 48 hours (traveling and meeting). A lot of time. Time is very precious.

I had to laugh at Doug's facebook status:

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berliozon

Time is fleeting and it flies by, and yes, there will be a day I no longer have any to give. I am so very grateful God gives me the 24 hours I have each day and the energy to work and do the things I need to do:)